Well, if you know me or have known me, you would know that I can be a bit sensitive when it comes to love. Now I'm not talking true love or husband and wife love, I'm talking like the love you feel for a best friend or someone you're really close to. It's been really bad lately and I have now clue why. I accuse people of not loving me which is crazy because I am blessed with so many amazing people who really do honestly love me. I mean you kind of have to love me to be around me because lets face it I'm obnoxious.
I'm going to be totally and completely honest with you, I have a fear of not being loved, of not being good enough to be loved, of not being loved in general. I've been pissing people of because of how often I accuse them of not loving me when they really truly do. Its some crazy paranoia that I have and I have no clue why I have it.
Part of me thinks its because for so long I didn't really know what love was, and now that I do I just want more and more to make up for that lost time. While another part of me thinks I think it because I don't love myself the way I should. Or maybe I'm just crazy.
But I want to apologize to everyone who I have hurt, upset, or offended lately, or in the past because of this fear. I really am truly sorry.
"Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends." -John 15:13
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