Reflection

Well if you didn't know, my birthday was Wednesday and if I was told correctly, that means I am another year older. Well due to the fact that a year is a long time and a lot can happen in a year I figured I should reflect on not only this past year but the past few years.

If you knew me last year you might not see a difference in me because the things that have changed are very subtle. Last year I had some emotional problems, I was lost, I was struggling with myself and my school, I wasn't as stable as I would have liked, and I just was conflicted. My anger acted up, I might have been a little flirtatious with people I shouldn't have been flirtatious with, and I had trouble controlling myself and my brain.

Now birthdays aren't really my thing, honestly they aren't super important to me, I had a bad time with birthdays in the past and I haven't really gotten over that.

If you go back a few tears ago when I was in elementary school and Jr. high you would see that I'm a completely different person.

I used to be shy timid and cared about the opinions of others. I strived for the things that aren't important, I was used by friends, and wasn't able to let go of them when I needed to. More importantly I was depressed and suicidal. Now I know I've said this before but I went through a tough time all by myself without showing it.

You see, birthdays in the past were in my mind, unfortunately another year of life that I had dealt with, and another year of life that I will have to deal with. And it just kind if stuck with me, I don't expect anything from birthdays now because honestly birthdays that consist of nothing are much better than my birthdays that consisted if sad thoughts.

This year I was shown by my best friends that birthdays are to be celebrated. My friends have taught me so much in the past few years, but this, this is something I would have never expected to be taught.

So thank you to everyone who has been in my life the past year I am thankful for everything you've done for me and shown me. I am truly blessed. Birthdays will forever be a celebration of how far I've came.